I’ve mentioned before that my training hasn’t been what I want it to be lately. But, then again. Maybe it has been what I have wanted it to be.
I’m constantly torn between feeling guilty for not training at the highest level and giving all my energies to running, and feeling proud that I don’t let running take over my life. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I LOVE to train hard. Like, I really do. But I also like to be a mom, a wife, a PERSON. Not just a runner.
I have little kids. A busy husband. Awesome opportunities to travel. Opportunities to serve. A growing business (Forca Online Coaching)
I have things going on right now that I know only last for a few short years. I will never be able to get time back with my babies. Never get time back to travel along with Nate and support him. There are things going on right now that are very time sensitive. I make it a conscious effort to never let running get in the way of some of those things. Because it’s really easy for me to get too into it. To let it consume me.
I’ve also noticed a trend; when people get obsessed with something, even something as good as exercising, it might be great for them physically, but they change. I dunno if they become too into themselves or what, but they seem to just become a lot more ‘worldly,’ for lack of a better word. Things of the world, such as looks, status, etc, take priority over family, friends, helping others.
I think becoming obsessed with anything is not healthy. Some might argue you have to be obsessed to be the best, but I don’t think so. I am friends with some of the best runners in the world, and there is a trend I notice about them. They are balanced. They are EXTREMELY hard working, driven, competitive, but they also have achieved a good balance in life. Essentially, they know when to turn it off. They know that their physical training is only one piece to the puzzle. It takes mental training. It takes healthy relationships. It takes being healthy in every aspect of life.
It’s real hard to find that balance. I flip flop from feeling guilty for not training hard enough, and guilty for letting my training take priority.
Now, let’s back up for a hot minute.
I am in no way saying that your kids/family/work should take over your life and you shouldn’t do anything for yourself. No way no how. It is VERY important to take time for yourself and continue to have your own identity and pursue dreams and goals. Like, I don’t ever feel bad that I’m not there when my kids wake up…Nate is there. I don’t feel bad leaving kids to go on trips with Nate, I think it’s healthy for both parents and kids to be away for a bit. I leave the house running when I have a girls night planned. However, the key here is: are you having girls nights every night? Do you take 4+ hours a day away from your kids just to exercise or whatever?
What I’m talking about is balancing time for yourself & not becoming obsessed with it. I’m saying there definitely is too much of a good thing. And the thing is, this balance is different for every person and family. Some families need more alone/away time; some need less. It’s a very personal thing but I think it’s a VERY important thing that we all need to strive for.
So balance. It’s hard. Real hard. Like I mentioned in my previous post, it’s hard for me to find balance because I am impatient and want to be the best at everything RIGHT NOW. If I want to be faster at running, I want to do everything right…get lots of sleep, run all the miles, do all the lifting, yogas, massage appointments, rehab appointments, naps, etc. But that kind of lifestyle would leave my kids a hot mess…our whole family would suffer. And I know that although I would probably be faster, I wouldn’t be happier. I wouldn’t be balanced.
I’m slowly learning that I can still work towards my own goals and dreams while being a great mom, wife, sister, daughter, friend etc. It just takes balance. It takes learning to accept your best effort for whatever your current circumstances are. It takes not giving up just because you can’t put all your effort into it; this is what I see happen a lot…
People think that just because they can’t devote all their energies into something, that they shouldn’t do it at all…ah! Don’t do that! Even doing the tiniest bit of running will help you get faster. Even if you aren’t in tip top shape, still sign up for that race and run as hard as your current fitness will allow. It’s okay to not improve every race, what’s not okay is not doing your best. (I’m using running as an example, but you can apply it to whatever).
Because when it boils down to everything in life, giving your best is all you can really ask for.
There have been some races that I didn’t do well in at all. But, I knew that for that day, I ran absolutely as hard as my body and mind allowed. And so I walked away from it happy; I still felt accomplished and proud.
I guess what I’m trying to say with all this rambling is, my running right now might not be amazing, but it’s the best I got and I’m learning to be okay with that. I’m learning that balance is what is most important for a happy, healthy life.
Do I want to get better at running? Absolutely. But I’m going to work on doing small and simple steps to doing that. That way, I can get better at running and hopefully everything else in my life as well.
With all that being said, here is what I did get in for running last week:
- Monday: 8 miles around town
- Tuesday: 5 miles pushing kids in the stroller
- Wednesday: 8 miles on the treadmill
- Thursday: 6.5 miles of hard trails
- Friday: Drove the ISU XC team to Montana. Was going to run when we got there, but was feeling sick and it was SNOWING. So I didn’t worry about it.
- Saturday: Busy day at the meet & driving the team home from Montana. Felt even worse so no way was I running.
- Sunday: OFF
Total Miles: 27.5
This Saturday Nate and I, along with our brother and sister are doing a trail marathon relay. Hopefully this sickness goes away and we are able to get some better training in this week. Of course, while still being balanced 😉
-till next time-